Vivek is toast – and even Christie won’t eat it! KENNEDY’s acid-tongued verdict on the real winners and losers of last night’s braggadocios, ball-hogging debate

Vivek, what the hell happened?!

For a candidate who ran such a disciplined campaign, it was clear after yesterday’s Republican primary runoff that he had turned into Marjorie Taylor Greene on the debate stage with an even longer list of conspiracies.

The nation applauded when Chris Christie – a political whale who had clearly resigned himself to swimming back into the sea of ​​wisdom of the elder statesman – gave this pugnacious brat a blast as a neophyte who had been told by Vivek to go out for a nice meal. .

Look, I love Christie’s fat joke as much as the next person, but this cheapest of cheap shots said so much about the failure of the out-of-control Ramaswamy’s campaign.

Christy, who had a surprisingly good night, wasn’t done yet.

His defining moment came when he rushed to Nikki Haley’s defense after a frenzied Ramaswamy challenged her like a playground bully to name the regions of eastern Ukraine, the not-so-subtle implication being that she didn’t understand basic geography.

Christie stopped an obsessive misogynist by branding him “the nastiest bully in America,” dispatching a loser sycophant with a cake knife, and—whisper it—maybe auditioning for Haley’s vice-presidential job if she snatches the nomination from prison. connected Donald Duck.

Vivek accused the other three of sucking up to Trump, but by now he had already demonstrated his reputation as a Donald supporter by delving into the Deep State nonsense and January 6th being an inside job.

What a colossal swing and epic miss from our hot-tempered, long-haired GOP windbag.

Ball-grabbing boasts may be funny, but they smack of depressing frivolity at the very top of American politics.

And one thing is for sure: Vivek’s once-charming candidate is now toast, and even Christie won’t eat it.

Accepting the fact that he couldn’t win this race, Christie’s took on the happy role of referee, rising above the fray to feast on the buffet of rationality and here to clean up the crap.

Indeed, this debate—a final of four between “Final Four”—got so heated that I needed a handful of Tums just to sleep.

NewNation power threesome Megyn Kelly, Elizabeth Vargas and Eliana Johnson were unflinchingly brutal, proving to moderators everywhere how to keep these rabble-rousing politicians on the right track.

You could say Kelly missed out on the prime-time spotlight.

Right out of the gate, she fired first missiles at Ron DeSantis, questioning him about his 30-point lead over Trump.

Ron, in a suit and high-heeled boots, took a minute to get to his feet as Kelly threw her Manolo Blahnik megagrenades.

But once he got down to business, it became apparent that last week’s Fox News runoff with Terrible Newsom taught him a thing or two.

He touted his impressive resume, his high-profile re-election in Florida in 2022, his record on Covid and criticized Haley for caving to the left on the issue of trans children.

But – as always with this grimacing governor – not everything was smooth sailing.

When asked if he would send American troops into the Gaza Strip, he muttered that a hungry Christie ate, prompting a 90-second “Hosanna” from him and highlighting Ron’s inability to give a straight answer.

Courageous Christie has also done more than anyone else to stand up to He Who Must Not Be Named – aka the orange Voldemort – the man who, let’s face it, will likely soon put these idiots out of work.

Although I wouldn’t sleep on Nikki Haley’s thriving girl power.

The menacing, blow-dried badass has emerged with the biggest target on her back after recently winning the backing of Death Star Koch’s Americans for Prosperity and liberal LinkedIn founder Reed Hoffman.

Hoffman has clearly lost faith in Biden’s bumbling and is put off by Trump’s toxicity, and while some of Haley’s policies may make him gag, he respects her like an adult.

This week he threw her Super PAC a $250,000 bone – and boy did it by giving the other boys on stage something to chew on.

As the messy dog ​​fight ensued, Hayley maintained her exquisite composure, thanking her rivals for their attention.

Clear gaps remain in her previous insistence that during her presidency, all Americans would be required to show identification to use social media. But on the whole she had learned the fine art of saying nothing in order to communicate everything.

A particularly delightful moment came when Vivek held up his school notebook with the words “NIKKI = CORRUPT” written on it.

When asked to hit back, Hayley simply replied, “No. I shouldn’t waste my time on him. Pure class.

So who won?

It’s clear to me that Nikki and Ron will both beat Biden and now the race is between them.

DeSantis is gradually improving—though still too slow to close the appalling gap with Trump.

If Haley can continue to make her case – getting more donors and clearing up troubling gray areas in her past statements – this could very well be hers.

But for now, it will take a Christmas miracle for these Republican rivals to win anything more than a silver medal.