Who is Ben Dillaway? Inside Brittany Higgins’ on-off relationship with her ex-boyfriend around the time of her alleged rape – as her explosive texts in her hour of need are revealed

Brittany Higgins’ close confidant Ben Dillaway was her on-off lover and one of the first people told about her alleged rape by Bruce Lehrmann.

Mr Dillaway, a former political strategist turned media guru for a global company, was back in the spotlight this week after flirtatious text messages with Ms Higgins were revealed in court.

Five weeks after the alleged rape, Ms Higgins sent Mr Dillaway selfies she had taken wearing the same white dress she had worn on the night she claimed the incident occurred.

The photographs were part of a package of documents released by the Federal Court as part of Lerman’s libel claim against Lisa Wilkinson and Network Ten.

“I’m working on my selfie game,” she wrote to Mr. Dillaway, admitting in court this week that she was “trying to be flirty.”

“Damn, you look hot,” Mr. Dillaway, now a devout Christian, responded to the messages.

The former Gold Coast journalist was a long-time media adviser to Queensland Liberal MP Steve Ciobo when he first met Ms Higgins in late 2018.

The couple met while working as coalition staff in Parliament, but after a few months they soon became friends and then, by early 2019, lovers.

Canberra insiders told Daily Mail Australia the pair were “just getting on” and had begun what was described in court as a “close personal relationship”.

The friendship became intimate – but despite the couple’s closeness, their relationship never became serious.

Ms Higgins told the Federal Court this week they had an on-off relationship and sometimes sent each other “sexts”.

Party workers at the time recall the “doomsday” mentality that spread across Canberra as the government faced apparent defeat in the federal election.

Insiders said coalition workers were living on the brink of an uncertain future, not knowing where they would live or even whether they would find work in a few months.

Relationships like Ms. Higgins’s and Mr. Dillaway’s can explode quickly, but they can also fade just as quickly, colleagues say.

Her whirlwind romance with Mr. Dillaway had already fizzled out by the time of the alleged rape, which Mr. Lehrmann vehemently denies, on March 23, 2019.

However, Dillaway, 38, was still considered a close friend and confidante.

After the alleged rape at Parliament House, Ms Higgins told him that after-hours drinks ended up in a minister’s office, which he said was unusual.

She added: “I need to slow down a little bit. Things have probably gotten a little out of control lately, haha.”

Three days after the alleged attack, she finally admitted to him that that night “didn’t turn out the way I kissed.”

“I don’t remember how I got there at all, I vaguely remember that Bruce was there, and then I woke up in the morning, half dressed, in the minister’s office on Saturday morning,” she wrote.

“It was just Bruce and I don’t really feel like it was consensual… Why did he leave me there like that?” she wrote to Mr. Dillaway.

– So he fucked you? I hope you are well. This is some seriously scary stuff. You should probably report this,” he replied.

At Lehrmann’s criminal trial last year, which was thrown out due to juror misconduct, Dillaway told the ACT Supreme Court Ms Higgins was a “broken, broken person”.

“It was like a light went out in her,” he said.

“I just remember her crying and really losing it and I just held her in my arms and she was what I would call a broken person.”

He tried to convince her to go to the police, but said she told him she “didn’t want a soul to know” and was afraid of losing her “dream job” in the defense minister’s office.

“I think she didn’t want it to become what it is now – where she’s in the media spotlight,” Mr Dillaway, who is now in a new relationship, told the court.

Mr Dillaway said he simply wanted to show her support and try to get her help and approached then-Prime Minister Scott Morrison’s office.

“I said, ‘Let me discreetly speak to someone in the Prime Minister’s Office because that could certainly get the ball rolling, or it could certainly get you the help you need,'” he told the court.

Eleven days after the alleged rape, Mr Dillaway said he contacted PMO officer Julian Lembruggen, with Ms Higgins’ permission, to try to gain support from the Prime Minister.

But in court this week, Ms Higgins added: “As much as I trusted Ben and truly adored him, he was still a senior media adviser to a Liberal minister.

“I didn’t quite trust him that it wouldn’t get to one of his best friends (in the Prime Minister’s office) … so I didn’t trust that all my thoughts and feelings wouldn’t go straight back to Liberal CHQ (campaign headquarters).”

Scott Morrison later denied that he was informed of the allegations days before they were aired by The Project in February 2021.

Friends say the relationship had already been put on the backburner by the time the rape allegations were made, but Ms Higgins said she tried to rekindle the romance five weeks later.

“We have reopened the case,” Ms Higgins told the Federal Court, explaining her reason for sending him photographs of herself in a white dress.

Ms Higgins, who is now engaged to former journalist David Sharaz, told the court she wore the dress again because it was her favorite and she wanted to “get” it back.

She said: “I took a photo in the bathroom because I was feeling awkward that night… I guess I was trying to be flirty.”

But after the coalition’s surprise election victory in 2019, friends say the couple “simply drifted apart and went their separate ways.”

Later that year, Mr. Dillaway rediscovered his religious beliefs and “returned” to his faith. He now regularly posts Bible verses on his personal social media accounts.

He is scheduled to be called in federal court Thursday as a witness in Lerman’s libel case, and on Wednesday he published a Bible verse he believes is relevant to the case.

“I grew up a Christian, and while I have always believed in Jesus, I certainly haven’t always lived my life that way,” the part-time motocross champion wrote on Instagram.

“When I came back to my faith in 2019 and started reading the Bible, this was one of my favorite verses.

“Since I will be forced to appear in Federal Court tomorrow as a witness, I have returned to this verse.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” Philippians 4:6 NIV.”